Thrown at crossroads

What happened today is something that i am not able to grasp, elucidate and left me in dismay.

** Here is what happened **
After hearing about the blood donation camp set outside by work, i decided that i wanted to donate blood. This was my first time and i was very nervous. I got there, provided my identification and sat down with an employee to fill up the initial questionnaire and provide a blood sample. I was told that the blood would be sent to the lab and tested for 28 different diseases before it being provided to others. I was asked a series of questions about my health history and my nationality, race and so on. And then came to the part of "the countries i have visited in past one year". I had been on vacation to India and Singapore. After a certain point, the employee looked worried and broke the news to me that i cannot donate blood. Because??? Because of the fact that i had been to India within past one year.

** Here is how i reacted **
I was shocked by that news. As i began to tell her this whole thing was stupid, tears started to rolled down my cheeks. The employee stared at me with a disbelief as i sat there, believe it or not, crying. I apologized for my reaction and tried to explain that i was feeling very offended.Employee being nice enough, tried to console me and gave me kudos for at least trying.I walked out of there without understanding the feeling...
What i did was silly but come to think it was it really??

I guess i should confess that for the first time in three years of my stay in the US i felt, i dont know if it is the right word, discriminated. It has nothing to do about me, i understand that. It could have been anyone who had been to India. So, that was not what was bothering me.It was the fact that it was India. It was the whole thing of "please don't get blood from people who have been to India". My reaction is a shock to me, leave alone others. I was supposed to be someone who would have got up, said "Whatever". I thought i was someone who was not attached to any place. But i felt different today.India, home, my country and everything about it... I finally felt i am a part of it. I shed a tear because its mine.

It has made me question everything about me and what i thought i was. But then i also thought, all Indians who live in some place outside India, should face these crossroads someday or the other. Have they felt the same way? A crossroad you face when you come to face to face with the unknown love that you have always had for the place, that has made you what you are today?Every now and then, i bump into Indian couples who are contemplating moving back to India. I used to wonder what triggered that desperate need to leave behind a good lifestyle, "better than India in every which way" country.

Now i understand that it’s all these small things, that time and again makes us realize that home is home, no matter how imperfect and how annoying. What is that about one’s own country that makes us feel so strongly about it? What is it?Of course, there are lot of discriminations stories i have heard in the past, at work place, amongst friends. But i could always take it with a pinch of salt thinking "It is the ignorance of one person".But what happened today is set by the government of United States. Risk of Malaria, from any person who has visited India in a year!!! I mean don't we have better science and technology to test that stuff?? To determine if the person is healthy or not??
Cynical we say.
I am experiencing mixed emotions right now. What i feel, i dont understand.I can of course, pack my bags, and leave. Who cares, right?But all i wanted in my life was to experience, see the world, try to understand what people are, what places are made of. I stepped out of home not knowing where it was taking me, because that the choice i made. Consequences of my choices will be revealed to me as time chooses to... But today i know that there will be this something that i will never be able to leave behind. Today i know, there will always be a moment of sadness, a moment of nostalgia, every time i am enjoying my experiencing of "seeing the world".
I am only happy that i cried...

Coffee day RIP OFF!!

I was in chennai this June and decided to get a cup of coffee at Coffee day (Ispahani center) and i cant believe that place is still open.
Here's my experience and hopefully will help others.
1) I ordered strawberry milkshake from the menu. The server asked me what what topping i want on the milkshake (like caramel or chocolate, cant remember) I picked what i wanted and i ended up getting a bill with Rs 30 for the topping. Now, this extra charge for the topping is not specified on the menu nor was it verbally conveyed to me by the server guy. What a rip off!!
Aren't they supposed to tell customers that topping will be charged extra?? How am i supposed to magically know that it costs extra??
2) My friend wanted blue granita or something like that. We were informed that they have run out of it and will make something else thats similar for her. She was ok with it. The blue granita, if i remember right cost between Rs 50 - Rs 60. When we got the bill, the new drink they made her, that was basically blue coloured water with no taste, was charged Rs 120.
No item on their menu cost Rs 120!!! Where did they come up with this charge, noone over there was able to explain me that.
When i insisted i speak to the manager, as expected, was told that manager was not at the store. Wonder why they are even managers. When i stromed out of the store, one of the guys who worked there came behind me and tried to hand me some free biscuits and asked me not to get mad. Talk about throwing a bone!! I clearly told him that i dont want his free stuff and its highly unethical to run business and cheat customers like this.
I am so furious about this experience. I cant believe people go to such a place and get ripped off everyday. They just throw the money and wont stand up if things were not right. Bunch of wannabes.
I am not sure if there is a forum where one can make a complaint and it will be officially looked into. If you know of any, please let me know.
Also, what amazes me is that people dont mind being ripped off.
I was never a regular to that coffee day and I wont step into that place ever again. I would suggest you dont either.

I have tried to get over this for past whatever months. But i couldn't. I constantly kept thinking that i have to do something. Spread the experience, least i can do about this.

Rudranaamam Bhajeham

During my last India trip, i was having a chat with my mother about her trip to Kasi and various other holy places in India. Everytime she spoke about it her eyes widened and she spoke with smile. Like a 16 year old talking about her infactuation, like a 6 year old talking about seeing Aliens. There was a sparkle which i read as fanaticism towards Hinduism. Her description about Kasi, the rituals for the dead, the crowd that gathers there, seeing the ganges... it was all filled with awe. I couldnt understand it and i did not want to understand it. "Freaking fanatics!!" I thought to myself.
Then one day, i came across this video from a Tamil movie called "Naan Kadavul".
The video is that of a sanskrit song singing praises of Lord Shiva, pictured in Kasi. That is all i want to say about this video. By the end of it, i was spine chilled. I just sat there staring at the monitor. The magnanimity of the song can not be explained in words. Now i am beginning to understand my mother, her awe, her admiration for a place called Kasi. I am not sure what it really is... but i think i know. If small video about Kasi with a powerful Sanskrit song can be so powerful, i can not wait to witness the actual Kasi in all of its spirits.
I feel i know nothing about my own country **Ashamed**
I personally think everyone should listen to this song once in a lifetime. I can't assure myself that everyone will feel the same way as i do. But it's worth the try. Because even if they remotely do, they will sense the power, softness, truth and a "larger than life" feeling.
Here is the video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=607JFixZYys

Here is a link if you want to focus on the sanskrit song -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwlW0GxSw_A

Like it's not already difficult to start writing...

Blog sites offer you a fool proof "I give up blogging" opportunity, the minute you log into their home page. Yes my friends, this opportunity is called "Blog Title". This is the most torture some experience... the irrefutable desire to have the coolest blog title on the world wide web. I cannot count the number of times I have created a blog and gave up after being unable to find a cool blog title. Sigh!
But now I am grown up and I can feel confident about myself without a cool blog title and without any fans on Orkut. "Brain Fuse Blow Up" might not be cool but it is four words I know and it saves me three human days.
So, imagine the "Fez" in me saying "I saidh, have a goodh dhay!"
I rest in peace.